Cricket
season is here and as the IPL takes over the TV screens and the stadium greens
in a few days’ time, I think the time is right to discuss the true importance
of the Indian Premier League, tongue firmly in cheek of course. Now for those
uninitiated in the ways of the land that is India under the rule of the king
that is BC CI (interpret what you may), the IPL was conceived in 2008 amidst
great fanfare and hope following India’s unprecedented triumph in the 2007 T20
World Cup. The baby grew rapidly and exponentially to devour most other prime
time TV programmes and surreptitiously empty the coffers of the producers of
the same. In its own way the IPL revolutionized the Indian cricketing industry
as well as the Indian television industry but unfortunately, unlike its lower
TRP grabbing TV counterparts, could not win any awards. In all fairness to the IPL,
I will now proceed to suggest some awards which should be bestowed on the
prodigal son of the Indian king without any further delay.
The
Nobel Peace Prize: The
IPL should have received this award ages ago when it got Andrew Symonds and
Harbhajan Singh to play on the same team after the much publicized Monkeygate
incident. The IPL unites nationalities, races, colours, castes and religions
like no other .Where else can you see Sourav Ganguly captain Shoaib Akhtar?
The
Nobel Prize for Economics: If
anyone doubts the IPL’s merit in receiving this prestigious award, I suggest
you simply go live in Kolkata for one season, watch them finish the wooden
spooners in the IPL, yet walk away with the maximum monetary profit at the end
of the season. The elephant in the room i.e. the BC CI coffers which are
bursting at the seams 6 seasons is further testimony to award the brainchild of
the mahout. At least then “he” can maybe realize that the elephant is visible
to the general public.
The
Nobel Prize for Physics: Frankly speaking in a country where IIT
aspirants overpopulate the plains and the hills, the Ghats and the plateaus,
the numerous sixes hit and the projectile motion hence executed teach more than
the HC Vermas and Bhatnagars. The change in momentum of a ball when it is
expertly cover driven undoubtedly attracts a student more than a mundane
Physics book. In short the IPL has done more for Newton and his Laws in 6
seasons than a thousand books could in the many years preceeding the birth of
this Physics genius, fondly called IPL. If indeed the IPL wins this award Chris
Gayle should go up on stage to receive it as he is undoubtedly the greatest
contributor to the IPL’s cause in this category.
The
Nobel Prize for Chemistry: The enviable
‘chemistry’ that Bollywood and the IPL shares should be the focus of this
award. Indeed the IPL serves as the ‘catalyst’ for many a film promotion, as
the strong ‘bond’ between superstar owners and superstar cricketers (their
actions and reactions often ending in jhappis
and pappis) and as a ‘litmus’ test
for the young guns hoping for an Indian Blue. The arguments for IPL winning
this award can go on and on but I think I have made my point to the Committee
to at least consider my case.
The
Nobel Prize for Medicine: The
Rahul Sharma-Wayne Parnell performance enhancing drugs bust up can serve as a
starting point for an investigation into the seedy backrooms of science where
apparently astonishing progress is being made in development of such drugs for
use in the IPL. Indeed , maybe more path breaking than any American research .
The Academy Awards: The Academy Awards, fondly known as the Oscars,
should definitely honour the IPL in most of its’ categories:
Ø The Academy Award for Best
Director:
There are many contenders for this award including the poker-faced Srinivasan
who has apparently very effectively ‘directed’ the IPL from inside and of
course the very popular Dawood Ibrahim who had ‘directed’ the IPL from outside.
Ø The Academy Award for Best
Script:
There cannot be a more dramatic script than S SreeSanth’s every ball, which
according to media reports, was ‘scripted’. An original script, finally!
Ø The Academy Award for Best Dialogue: If anyone has actually watched the IPL
on TV , they will agree that Ravi Shashtri should be the unanimous choice for
this award courtesy his gems during commentary.
Ø The Academy Award for Best
Original Score: The
IPL song which now lords over discotheques, DJ nights , rave parties , cricket
matches , birthday celebrations and basically any and every occasion that is
worth mentioning in an Indian life without having to use any actual words is
undoubtedly the No.1 contender for this award. I also see no reason why it
shouldn’t be conferred with a Grammy Award immediately.
If
more extensive research is conducted into the realms of the IPL, I am sure we
will find it worth much more. Truly, the IPL has been wronged and severely so. To
the people in power, please take note and do the needful. The IPL needs to be
paid its due.
